it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize