fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
