walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
