You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Randomize
