Dual....:-)
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
