I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
You're so nebulous sometimes
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
