Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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