she is the kim kardashian of front butts
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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