I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
