youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
