If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize