Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
