So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
