He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
