My boss' voice literally gives me gas
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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