it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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