Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
