That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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