just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
