If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
