Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
