ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize