He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
