weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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