I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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