Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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