And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
organizing the empties. That sober.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
