I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize