yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
