Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
