I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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