i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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