I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
PS: I just woke up from my shower
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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