a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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