Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
