love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
