Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
