70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's shark week go big or go home
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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