my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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