life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
