Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
