PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize