I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
