I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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