Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
