I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
