I hope mine doesn't look like that
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
