Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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