when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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