How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
