My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
