Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
